Sunday, August 10, 2025

Fly Safe!

You all may recognize the line “If you see something, say something” as the tagline from the advertising campaign run by the Transportation Security Administration (TSA). It is ubiquitous on airport posters and billboards and is supported by near constant announcements over the crystal clear airport PA systems. Its intent is to enlist the masses to identify anything that looks out of place or suspicious.

 

Personally, I like the idea of reminding everyone to be vigilant. I appreciate and support this effort to keep airports safe.

 

So yesterday, I had a fairly long layover in Chicago and I sought out a quiet space where I could avoid the crowds and read while I waited. I found an inactive gate with only two or three people sitting among 50 or 60 empty seats. There was also a black backpack tucked under one of the empty seats and I fully expected some panicked passenger to come rushing back for it at any second.

 

After a half hour or so, a few agents showed up at the gate to prepare for an upcoming flight and the backpack was still unclaimed. Being fully sensitized by the constant advertisements, I decided to approach the agents to make them aware of the situation. I didn’t expect them to see it as a potential threat but, at a minimum, I thought they would secure the bag and try to find the owner. But they just laughed it off and dismissed me.

 

Some time later, a policeman with a bullet-proof vest, a gun in his holster, and handcuffs hanging from his belt arrived on the scene. I noticed another passenger spoke to him and pointed out the backpack. I heard the policeman laugh and say “they forget luggage and phones and even babies sometimes…ha ha ha”. Then he wandered away, ostensibly in search of donuts.

 

I didn’t think the backpack posed a real threat, but I surely didn’t expect total apathy from the airport officials. Especially since, an hour earlier, they made a big deal about throwing away my toothpaste when I passed through security.

Tuesday, August 5, 2025

Legacy Planning...


Darwin’s theory of evolution, Newton’s laws of motion, Planck’s constant; some guys get lauded in every high school science class, across the world, every year. Heisenberg's uncertainty principle, Avogadro’s number, Einstein’s theory of relativity; the list of branded scientific axioms goes on and on.

 

These eponymous nuggets of human insight are systematically passed along by the educational system to every new generation. It’s a brilliant form of legacy perpetration.

 

Archemedes’ Principle, Pythagorean’s theorem, Occam’s razor (a razor?)… they give these out like candy. I am wondering, "how hard could it be to get one of my own?"

 

Now, I don’t want to do any hard work or anything. I’m not about to invent the static-electric motor (shout out to John Galt) or map the human connectome. I figure if I toss a few ideas into cyberspace (via this blog post) and you imaginary readers reference my concepts in your conversations and social media posts, the world just might one day associate an important idea with my name. #BulletProofLegacy 

 

Here are options to get the ball rolling:

 

The Fortier Principle of Accidental Genius
Given enough time and vague ambition, a person will eventually say something that sounds profound — entirely by accident. This is how TED Talks happen 

 

Dennis’ Postulate of Selective Memory
People remember things in whatever way makes them feel smarter, kinder, or funnier. The rest is lost to the void. History books work the same way.

 

The Fortier Phenomenon
Any idea, no matter how impractical or absurd, can gain credibility if you present it with a confident tone and a bulleted list. I bet you’re nodding right now.

 

Fortier's Cognitive Load Paradox

The more tabs you have open in your browser, the less you remember why you opened any of them, but you are sure they are all too important to close. It’s a paradox.

 

Den's Feedback Loop

When your smart devices recommend things based on your past choices, which reinforces future choices until your entire digital life is just ads for golf lessons and reels of random people who trip, slip, or bump their heads.

 

Fortier's Mirror Effect

The tendency to believe information more readily when it confirms your own mildly flattering self-perception. “It says people with messy desks are geniuses. Must be true." Fortier’s Mirror Effect.

 

The rest is up to you all. Just go ahead and use these concepts liberally; one or another is bound to catch on. 

 

Immortality, here I come!