Fly Safe!

You all may recognize the line “If you see something, say something” as the tagline from the advertising campaign run by the Transportation Security Administration (TSA). It is ubiquitous on airport posters and billboards and is supported by near constant announcements over the crystal clear airport PA systems. Its intent is to enlist the masses to identify anything that looks out of place or suspicious.

 

Personally, I like the idea of reminding everyone to be vigilant. I appreciate and support this effort to keep airports safe.

 

So yesterday, I had a fairly long layover in Chicago and I sought out a quiet space where I could avoid the crowds and read while I waited. I found an inactive gate with only two or three people sitting among 50 or 60 empty seats. There was also a black backpack tucked under one of the empty seats and I fully expected some panicked passenger to come rushing back for it at any second.

 

After a half hour or so, a few agents showed up at the gate to prepare for an upcoming flight and the backpack was still unclaimed. Being fully sensitized by the constant advertisements, I decided to approach the agents to make them aware of the situation. I didn’t expect them to see it as a potential threat but, at a minimum, I thought they would secure the bag and try to find the owner. But they just laughed it off and dismissed me.

 

Some time later, a policeman with a bullet-proof vest, a gun in his holster, and handcuffs hanging from his belt arrived on the scene. I noticed another passenger spoke to him and pointed out the backpack. I heard the policeman laugh and say “they forget luggage and phones and even babies sometimes…ha ha ha”. Then he wandered away, ostensibly in search of donuts.

 

I didn’t think the backpack posed a real threat, but I surely didn’t expect total apathy from the airport officials. Especially since, an hour earlier, they made a big deal about throwing away my toothpaste when I passed through security.

Legacy Planning...

Darwin’s theory of evolution, Newton’s laws of motion, Planck’s constant; some guys get lauded in every high school science class, across the world, every year. Heisenberg's uncertainty principle, Avogadro’s number, Einstein’s theory of relativity; the list of branded scientific axioms goes on and on.

 

These eponymous nuggets of human insight are systematically passed along by the educational system to every new generation. It’s a brilliant form of legacy perpetration.

 

Archemedes’ Principle, Pythagorean’s theorem, Occam’s razor (a razor?)… they give these out like candy. I am wondering, "how hard could it be to get one of my own?"

 

Now, I don’t want to do any hard work or anything. I’m not about to invent the static-electric motor (shout out to John Galt) or map the human connectome. I figure if I toss a few ideas into cyberspace (via this blog post) and you imaginary readers reference my concepts in your conversations and social media posts, the world just might one day associate an important idea with my name. #BulletProofLegacy 

 

Here are options to get the ball rolling:

 

The Fortier Principle of Accidental Genius
Given enough time and vague ambition, a person will eventually say something that sounds profound — entirely by accident. This is how TED Talks happen 

 

Dennis’ Postulate of Selective Memory
People remember things in whatever way makes them feel smarter, kinder, or funnier. The rest is lost to the void. History books work the same way.

 

The Fortier Phenomenon
Any idea, no matter how impractical or absurd, can gain credibility if you present it with a confident tone and a bulleted list. I bet you’re nodding right now.

 

Fortier's Cognitive Load Paradox

The more tabs you have open in your browser, the less you remember why you opened any of them, but you are sure they are all too important to close. It’s a paradox.

 

Den's Feedback Loop

When your smart devices recommend things based on your past choices, which reinforces future choices until your entire digital life is just ads for golf lessons and reels of random people who trip, slip, or bump their heads.

 

Fortier's Mirror Effect

The tendency to believe information more readily when it confirms your own mildly flattering self-perception. “It says people with messy desks are geniuses. Must be true." Fortier’s Mirror Effect.

 

The rest is up to you all. Just go ahead and use these concepts liberally; one or another is bound to catch on. 

 

Immortality, here I come!

 

Biggest News story of 21st Century

When the twin towers of the World Trade Center fell in 2001, I couldn't imagine any plausible news story that could have had more news coverage around the world. Perhaps my view was a bit USA-centric, for surely there were corners of the globe dealing with more important matters carrying more consequential local impact.

Then, in 2019, along came the Corona virus. There was no geographical escape from this news story; it was all Covid-19, all day long, for months on end, as the world grappled with a complex debate about how big a threat was actually at hand.

In comparison to today, those were cute little news stories. Today we know what serious, comprehensive coverage looks like. For a story to simultaneously command all channels of media and dominate all water-cooler dialogue, it must have important consequences that resonate throughout all societies. You know, something like this:

Kind of shocking to me how much play this story has gotten. I don't know about you all, but I am not taking my mistress to any Cold Play concerts...
 

Moving Walkways

 

 

One of mankind’s great innovations for accelerating the movement of pedestrian masses across long spaces is the moving walkway. They are strategically located in airports and other large buildings where people need to walk long distances under time pressure.  

 

These magical belts move slowly enough to allow travelers to step safely on and off, but quickly enough to get you to gate C36 before your flight leaves for Cleveland. Moving walkways are great. I love moving walkways.  

 

Of course, somewhere along mankind’s slow descent into a sloth-like existence, a false notion about moving walkways has taken hold. That false notion is that the purpose of a moving walkway is to replace walking. Somehow, a portion of the public has come to perceive them as moving “ride-ways”, with no walking involved. 

 

 Hey, no big deal. If you prefer to stand still, then stand still. Be my guest. Just don’t do it on the walkway where you impede the progress of grumpy old men trying to make a connection.

Privacy Shmivacy...

Privacy is great if you want it, but can be pretty inconvenient when you don't. Seems like we should be able to "opt out" of privacy at our own discretion.

For example, if you fill out a detailed medical history listing every condition in your family, from maternal and fraternal grandparents on down, including every allergy, surgery, and medication you've ever had, then you have compiled a very important and useful compendium of information that could help all of your doctors deliver optimal care. But if privacy policies dictate that the only person who can see your information is the one who requested it, then you may have just wasted a lot of time. Especially if you completed the exercise for an ophthalmologist during a routine exam. 

From a technology standpoint, such information is very sharable in electronic form. However, from a legal standpoint, healthcare institutions are required to "protect their patients' information" in accordance with state and federal regulations. The state regulations in California are extreme, by the way. 

Seems a little odd to me that individuals have no say in whether or not they want privacy. It has become a mandate, at all times, at the highest levels, even when it is neither important nor convenient to maintain. 

Phone Eats First

 

I know I am in the minority here and that most of you imaginary readers will hate this opinion. Anyway, here goes...

Food is sustenance. We need it to live. It's okay to dine on food that is cold, stale, or tasteless. Eating an unsatisfying meal won't kill you. In fact, it will keep you alive. Literally.

When eating out, there is really no need to consider and rank order every single item on the menu before ordering; you may rank them if you wish, but it is not required. Every now and then, perhaps you could just read down until you see one you like and get on with it. 

And no, unless we are married to one another, you may not sample my dish to see if you prefer it.

Also, this is important: you can eat food even if you don't take its picture first. I read that 1.3 billion photos of food are posted on Instagram every single day. I might have guessed higher. 

Look... I am happy that you enjoy a fine culinary experience. I also like a tasty meal. But I think requiring a transcendent experience three times a day is a burden that many people impose upon themselves unnecessarily. Set yourself free... it's okay to simply order the first thing on the menu, eat it, and go home. 

There... I said it; let the hate mail flow...

Arresting Art

 

It's the intent of the artist to stir the viewer's emotions. Of course, not all viewers are created equal and some of us are harder to stir than others. I have visited a great many museums around the world, and I find art interesting but I usually do not connect to it on any deep or emotional level. In fact, some of the world’s most famous art, pieces that are renowned for their ability to evoke a reaction and inspire awe, were only moderately engaging to me when I viewed them. 

 

The Mona Lisa? Very small and kind of dark, not sure if I really care if that is a smile or a sneer on her lips. The Last Supper, the Sistine Chapel…? Both nice I guess, but all of the religious symbolism is lost on me. The David, the Thinker...? Each impressive in detail and form, but neither emotionally captivating. 

 

Anyway, I was recently hurrying to a meeting in Los Angeles and I took a shortcut behind the Laker’s arena when…BLAM! I was literally and figuratively stopped in my tracks by the most captivating piece of art I have ever viewed. It was/is an eerily powerful piece. 

 

It is a bronze sculpture honoring Kobe Bryant and his daughter Gianna, who perished together in a helicopter crash along with several others. The two are depicted in street clothes, sitting on folding chairs (presumably court side at a basketball game), wrapped in angel wings. They are leaning into each other with the casual and loving embrace that any father and daughter would recognize. She is relaxed and secure, laughing with her head on his shoulder. He is quietly alive, embracing his role as protector and provider as he kisses her head.   

 

The sculpture is tucked in a quiet spot in the shadow of the arena, surrounded by a bed of flowers. Its poignancy cannot be ignored.  I walked past it four times last week and, based on my observations, it is a source of riveting interest for every person who encounters it.

Oh, Death! - A Poem about Life

 

It's the end of the calendar year. If you are feeling reflective, be it wistfully or gratefully, you might be in the perfect state of mind to connect with this poem.  I hope all my imaginary readers lived their lives well in 2024 and continue to do so in 2025.  

Oh, Death! 

Death asked me to join him for dinner 

so I slipped into my favorite black dress 

that I had been saving for a special occasion 

and let him walk me to our candlelit tryst. 

 

He ordered a ribeye, extra rare 

I ordered two desserts and red wine 

and then I sipped and wondered why he looked so familiar 

and smelled like earth and memory. 

 

He felt like a place both faraway 

and deep within my body 

A place that whispers to me 

on the crisp autumn breeze 

along the liminal edges of dusk and dawn 

somewhere between dancing and stillness. 

 

He looked at me 

with the endless night sky in his eyes 

and asked 

‘Did you live your life, my love?’ 

 

As I swirled my wine in its glass 

I wondered If I understood the thread I wove 

into the greater fabric 

If I loved in a way that was deep and freeing 

If I let pain and grief carve me into something more grateful 

If I made enough space to be in awe that flowers exist 

and take the time to watch the honeybees drink their sweet nectar. 

 

I wondered what the riddles of regret 

and longing had taught me 

and if I realized just how beautiful and insignificant 

and monstrous and small we are 

for the brief moment that we are here 

before we all melt back down into ancestors of the land. 

 

Death watched me lick buttercream from my fingers 

As he leaned in close and said 

‘My darling, it’s time.’ 

 

So I slipped my hand into his as he slowly walked me home. 

I took a deep breath as he leaned in close 

for the long kiss goodnight 

and I felt a soft laugh leave my lips as his mouth met mine 

because I never could resist a man 

with the lust for my soul in his eyes 

and a kiss that makes my heart stop. 

 

Author's note: A playful love poem to Death, because I want to remember to relate to it as a part of life, and in ways that exist outside of violence and brutality. - Gina Puorro

The "Debate" Debate

Well, it's an election year. This means we citizens get frequent calls from pollsters, platform fliers stuffed into our mailboxes, constant donation requests, and of course, televised debates. Or do we? 

I don't think we actually get debates... it's just the wrong term for what happens when candidates face off to discuss policy.

Perhaps my definition is too narrow, but I always thought a "debate" was when two sides, each with opposing views on a particular topic, would share and compare arguments advocating for their respective positions. I thought a debate was a structured affair with more or less equal time to make uninterrupted points and to offer salient rebuttals. I also thought a basic tenet of debate was that you had to support your perspective with generally well-vetted facts.

Anyone who more or less agrees with this definition of a debate would likely conclude that we don't really have Presidential debates. We have Presidential "squabbles", characterized by personal attacks and petty innuendo. Each side cherry picks facts and shares them out of context, each side usually exaggerates (or even lies) when convenient, and each side expends as much energy denigrating the other's character as they do critiquing their arguments. 

What is really sad is that this is the formula that seems most effective in swaying voter opinion. Many of us essentially vote for the squabbler most capable of witty comebacks and contemporaneous slander. These are probably not the best criteria for identifying competent leadership.

My preference would be for the voters to identify the issues that are most important to them in any given election, and then see a series of short debates that focus on one issue each time. For example, this year we might have had short debate on economic policy, followed by a short debate on border control, followed by other short debates on the climate or guns or abortion. 

Such single topic debates would elucidate where the candidates agree and where they differ. Importantly, with only one topic to cover, the debaters would have the time to "explain" their plans rather than just "refer" to them. They could also cite the sources of their information and fact checkers on each side could participate in the rebuttals using referenced sources. 

This would yield useful information to help voters determine which candidate's policies are most aligned with their personal priorities. Seems like a better plan than circulating memes on social media...

Appreciation for Leap Day!

I love leap Day. 

It's a day that is "special" for scientific reasons as opposed to other days that have been deemed special for historical reasons (I'm fine with those), religious reasons (not my thing), or commercial reasons (worst of all). Importantly, as far as I know, the main stream public has not yet widely adopted any particular Leap Day rituals; no one expects me to engage in any pre-determined behavior on this day. 

This morning, I was reflecting on how small we are; one recently evolved species, on one little planet, revolving around a sun that seems old to us but is a relative newcomer to the galaxy. At the same time, I was struck but how great we are in that we have somehow figured out that our planet is orbiting around the sun, and that we spin on our axis some 365.24 times for every trip around the sun. It's almost unfathomable to me that we know these things.

As depicted in the graphic above, the earth completes 365 spins (days) in fractionally less time than it takes us to complete a full orbit (year) around the sun. We all know this is why we need to add a "leap day" every 4 years to approximately keep our calendar system on track. But this is only an approximation. 

We also skip leap year about once every 100 years to fine tune the adjustment. Sadly, this will never happen in my lifetime; the last "skip" was in the year 1900, and the next will be in the year 2100. I am OK with that though, I suspect the whole thing will be infused with commercially-driven rituals by then anyway.