Appreciation for Leap Day!

I love leap Day. 

It's a day that is "special" for scientific reasons as opposed to other days that have been deemed special for historical reasons (I'm fine with those), religious reasons (not my thing), or commercial reasons (worst of all). Importantly, as far as I know, the main stream public has not yet widely adopted any particular Leap Day rituals; no one expects me to engage in any pre-determined behavior on this day. 

This morning, I was reflecting on how small we are; one recently evolved species, on one little planet, revolving around a sun that seems old to us but is a relative newcomer to the galaxy. At the same time, I was struck but how great we are in that we have somehow figured out that our planet is orbiting around the sun, and that we spin on our axis some 365.24 times for every trip around the sun. It's almost unfathomable to me that we know these things.

As depicted in the graphic above, the earth completes 365 spins (days) in fractionally less time than it takes us to complete a full orbit (year) around the sun. We all know this is why we need to add a "leap day" every 4 years to approximately keep our calendar system on track. But this is only an approximation. 

We also skip leap year about once every 100 years to fine tune the adjustment. Sadly, this will never happen in my lifetime; the last "skip" was in the year 1900, and the next will be in the year 2100. I am OK with that though, I suspect the whole thing will be infused with commercially-driven rituals by then anyway.

5-Day Run

Here is a brief description of a consecutive 5-day run of events that likely mean very little to anyone other than me.  That's the beauty of imaginary readers, I need never worry if my writing means anything to anyone else.

Feb 10 - The start of the Chinese New Year: Not a cause for major celebration among non-Asian descendants in the US, but kind of a big deal in Asia. I came to appreciate the Chinese calendar when I lived in Hong Kong, especially the Year of the Dragon. I recall being surprised at how being "a dragon" afforded me a degree of admiration that I did nothing to deserve other than being born in a particular year.

Feb 11 - The Super Bowl: Kind of a special day in America, especially for football fans but not only for football fans. I found myself home alone with a bowl of chips, a tub of guacamole, and a couple of cold beers. It was a good game and a great start to the Year of the Dragon!

Feb 12 - Lincoln/Darwin birthdays: Probably my two favorite historical figures, born on exactly the same day in history, separated only by a couple of hours and a few thousand miles.  Lincoln was a political mastermind at one of the most contentious times in US history, and laudably favored the people over any self-interest. Darwin was brilliant scientist who bravely championed empirical evidence over  the religious orthodoxy of the time. I always think of them both on 2/12.

Feb 13 - My 25th Wedding Anniversary: A milestone worth noting. We got lots of congratulatory messages, we went out to dinner, exchanged gifts, and saw a show. We discussed taking a trip but knew we would be pretty worn out from celebrating Lincoln and Darwin, so that's on hold for the time being.

Feb 14 - Saint Valentines Day: Everyone knows this one... no editorial necessary. 

Not sure if/when another prolonged streak of special days will hit, but I'll be sure to blog about it should one occur.

Year of the Dragon

 

 

Not sure if any of my imaginary readers pay attention to such things but today begins the Chinese New Year - welcome to the "Year of the Dragon". My year.

Here is some interesting perspective about we dragons (these indisputable facts may or may not have been conjured up by Chat GPT):

 

People born in the Year of the Dragon are believed to inherit characteristics such as strength, intelligence, and good fortune. The Year of the Dragon is often associated with power, vitality, and success, and it is considered an auspicious time for major life events such as marriage or starting a new business. Additionally, in Chinese culture, the Dragon symbolizes imperial power and is often seen as a guardian and protector. As a result, the Year of the Dragon holds cultural and symbolic importance, influencing various aspects of life including celebrations, traditions, and personal beliefs.

 

Not sure what the year has in store but it seems like maybe I should move to China, start a new business, and throw a big party... 

Who Would Want to Live in a Small Town?

 

I am aware of the drawbacks in small towns. Behavioral researchers will tell you that, across a small population, very few people are going to “make it big” and not many highly accomplished people will emerge as “aspirational examples” for others to follow. It's just math.

This reality can temper the dreams and ambitions of children growing up in small towns because, after all, aiming high and achieving greatly is less likely for those who have no examples to follow. Striving toward what you have seen around you is kind of the norm and aiming low can become a self-perpetrating cycle. 

Also, small towns can feel stifling. Rampant familiarity and a sense that everyone knows each other's business can really make one feel boxed in with no room to experiment or grow. Who would want to live like that? 

Then of course, there is this sort of thing: 

I recently traveled across the country and visited the small town where I grew up. Imaginary readers should note that it has been more than 30 years since I lived within a thousand miles of my boyhood home. One day during my brief visit, I ventured out to buy groceries in the middle of a snowstorm. Upon arriving at the store, I realized that I was not carrying my wallet and had no means of paying my bill. I didn’t want to drive back and forth unnecessarily through the snow and, as I pondered my dilemma, I spied a classmate from several decades ago. I approached her for help and, in true small-town fashion, she was handing me money before I could even finish explaining my predicament. I assured her that my brother would stop by to repay her in the days to come, but she waved off that suggestion as some sort of insult. 

Stuff like that happens a lot in small towns. It's a way of life that you can't get anywhere else. I think it's probably okay to forego worldly ambition in the name of simplicity and contentment, but I fear that all too often, the sparkle of the big city blinds many people from the humble glow of the small town. 

24 Years

At some point during my early years of fatherhood, I considered the 6-year gap between the birth of my oldest and the birth of my youngest child. I calculated that I would have 24 years of parenthood before they were all adults which seemed like a luxurious eternity, practically endless in its expanse. Definitely enough time to perfect the art of raising children.

I wrote about this before, at the ten year mark with my "A Decade of Parenthood" post. At that point, I admitted to not knowing much about parenting, but I still thought I would learn it all eventually. It also seemed to me that I had all the time in the world to do so. Wrong and wrong.

By the time any of my imaginary readers see this post, my youngest will be 18 years old; my 24 years will have completely elapsed. Along the way, I came to realize that there is no right way to parent; it's clearly an ongoing exercise of "make-it-up as you go". But I surely underestimated how quickly it would pass. The whole ordeal is like a runaway train that picks up speed every year... you can't slow it down and you can't catch up to climb back on. It just barrels down the track toward an uncertain future that arrives too soon. 

I guess you're never really finished parenting, at least not until your offspring begin providing more care to you than you do to them. In that regard, I'll keep my job for much more than 24 years. But it is already clear to me that parenting children and parenting adults are two different experiences that bring different flavors of satisfaction. For sure both are great, and both are fulfilling, but they are not the same. 

Christmas Be Gone? Not so fast...

Photo Credit: Terri Hartley

At some point in the last couple of decades, some of you imaginary readers may have heard me muttering about how I hate Christmas. Nothing agains Christ or Christians, I just don't enjoy the extreme commercialization and ever-expanding, stress-inducing rituals that so many people get mindlessly sucked into "enjoying". 

You may have even heard my proclamation that, should I become ruler of the world, I would cancel all holidays. If that makes me seem like a curmudgeon then...well... get off my lawn!

This year, I learned about an exciting new product: "Christmas be gone" in a spray can. I immediately scoured the internet for purchase options while dreaming about the satisfaction of dousing carolers and ugly sweater wearers. Turns out the product doesn't really exist... and maybe that's okay.

The Fortiers took a subdued approach to XMAS this year attending one small party during the week before, a family movie on Christmas eve, sensible gift giving and the exchange of thoughtful, hand-made cards, and a close family of three joining us for Christmas dinner. It was really nice. I didn't hate any of it.

Now don't get me wrong, we 're not talking a grinch-like transformation or anything like that... and I still probably hate the other holidays, but Christmas 2023 was a really good one capping off a challenging year. 

I'll try to keep this momentum leading up to New Year's Eve... might even stay up until midnight!

No Stopping Me Now

Well, this is bad news for my enemies… 

See that photo? That little, red, twisty thing is what Italian scientists call a “corno”; it means “horn” in English. This one came from Naples and, according to well-substantiated scientific fact, it will likely change my life. 

The "science", which is sometimes called "conjecture" by the haters, has been passed along from Italian grandma to Italian grandma for generations, and has proven the following fact: the corno attracts good fortune and repels curses if it is (1) made by hand, (2) painted red, and (3) given as a gift. 

Check, check, check; mine meets all 3 criteria. 

So now that I have received this gift, how do I expect my life to change? 

Well, of course, unlikely events of good fortune will find me on a regular basis. You can follow me on social media to keep track of my forthcoming holes in one, straight flushes, and appearances on Jumbotrons at major sporting events. This is likely to be so common that I may need to register the handle @JumbotronGuy to launch my career as an influencer. 

But more importantly, if any of you imaginary readers have ever put a curse on me, it will no longer be effective. The curse-cancelling powers of the corno are a well-established fact that drives the entire superstition industry in Naples. 

No stopping me now... your move enemies!

The Mystery Hour

One moment you are naked on a table in a strange room; unfamiliar faces surround you. A moment later you are at home, all dressed. You don't know how you got there.

There is a large gap in your memory. A full hour has elapsed and you have no recall of the last 60 minutes. It's a mystery!

You check social media for scandalizing posts or photos... no clues... mild relief. 

You are too drowsy to investigate further. You shuffle to bed for a 3-hour nap.

You wake up hungrier than you've ever been (except for that time in China when you missed your flight twice and had no currency). As you ravage the pantry, it all comes back to you. 

You spent yesterday in the bathroom, didn't eat for 24 hours, and had a colonoscopy today.

You wonder if you hitch-hiked home with no pants...

Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion

DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) is an approach that focuses on creating situations that value and include people from diverse backgrounds, treating those people fairly, and providing them with equal opportunities. DEI initiatives are everywhere, but I have a couple problems with this all-encompassing movement, one of which is merely semantic, the other is more substantial. 

Now, I admit,  I may get hung up on semantics a little more often than I should. This has been a life-long trait that annoyed my siblings when we were kids. They even gave me a pejorative childhood nickname related to my precise interpretations of their casual expressions. 

In terms of semantics, it bothers me that there can be so much overlap in the meaning of these three words. In fact, if we cancelled efforts on Diversity and Equity, but did a good job on Inclusion, I think almost everything these programs aim to achieve would work out fine. 

Think about it, if work places, and communities, and organizations were focused on inclusion for all their members, then Equity would happen naturally. No one would be excluded from equal opportunities, equal pay, and equal treatment; they would be “included” on all fronts. This principle of inclusion would of course be extended to diverse members of the group which would minimize the need to specifically focus on diversity. Maybe the whole initiative could just be call "Inclusion".

On the other hand, focusing only on inclusion does seem to stop short of actively pursuing a diverse membership in certain instances when diversity should be sought. I admit that would be a weakness of an "inclusion-only" approach, but that brings me to the more concrete issue I have with DEI. Specifically, diversity is not always good. 

There. I said it. Probably getting cancelled as you read this...

Don't get me wrong. I know that diverse groups can be more creative in developing solutions to complex problems, and can also be more sensitive to how well policies will generalize across a diverse population. In these instances, diversity is clearly good. I agree.

But research also shows that groups focused on executing plans, once the creative solutions have been developed, are often more productive and efficient when they are a tightly knit, homogenous team. In those instances, forcing a diverse membership to function as a single unit can be counter-productive.

Overall, I think DEI initiatives should not be automatic nor universal, but rather, they should be selectively adopted where clearly needed and beneficial. I am not suggesting a major cutback, but a little more thought about how and where to emphasize DEI would be a step in the right direction.

And maybe we need a new acronym, derived from words whose meanings don’t overlap.

Coopers, Cobblers, and Grocery Baggers

Grocery bagger showing why he is bad at Tetris

Below is a list of ten historical occupations, nine of which required years of training to acquire the necessary skills to succeed. Consequently, those who plied these artful trades took genuine pride in their work and stood behind the quality of their output. 

The tenth, grocery bagging, took almost no training and no more than a trace of conscientiousness to find success. Heck, I mastered it at age 16 after five minutes of instruction from a man who accidentally locked himself in the bread room later that same day. Despite the easy path to skill acquisition, I believe that my co-workers and I all took a reasonable degree of pride in our work. 

Somehow, all of the trades that required tremendous expertise have became obsolete* in the face of more efficient technologies, while grocery bagging has persisted. Even more surprising is the fact that grocery bagging has endured while grocery bagging skills (a generous term) have declined precipitously. My first-hand experience suggests that the field is now mired in a sea of feckless practitioners. No need to cite examples; I am sure my imaginary readers have observed this first-world problem on their own.

That's a logical contradiction, right? Shouldn't the skilled trades persist and the simple ones be replaced. Anyway, here's the comparative list:

1. Cooper - A cooper was a skilled artisan who made barrels and casks. 

2. Cobbler - A cobbler was a skilled tradesperson who repaired and made shoes and boots. 

3. Blacksmith - A blacksmith was a metalworker who forged and shaped iron and steel. 

4. Farrier - A farrier was a specialist in equine hoof care and shoeing. 

5. Milliner - A milliner was a skilled artisan who made hats. 

6. Wheelwright - A wheelwright was a skilled artisan who made and repaired wheels. 

7. Silversmith - A silversmith was a metalworker who specialized in creating silver objects. 

8. Bookbinder - A bookbinder was a specialist craftsman who bound and repaired books. 

9. Calligrapher - A calligrapher was an artist who specialized in creating decorative writing by hand. 

10. Grocery Bagger – A grocery bagger was a teenager who needed cash to keep his car running, had a modicum of spatial reasoning skills, and who understood that a gallon of milk could crush grapes. 

There are many ways to measure a country’s success. Some suggest that life expectancy is the best measure, others look at percentage of the population that lives above the poverty line, and a third group believes an index of self-reported happiness is the ultimate measure. The USA tends to fare ok on these measures relative to other industrialized countries; we’re not the best nor the worst. 

But if they ever start ranking based on grocery bagging, I fear we may be last.

___________________

*Not sure about farriers